Tossing batting practice…while warming up in the bullpen for Venezuela

The start of today’s softball showdown between the US and Venezuela is being delayed, and CNBC is treating us to some mixed doubles badminton.

Hehehehehehehe, shuttlecock hehehehehehe.

Ok, now that I’ve got that out of my system, this match does not feature either Brian Urlacher or David Ortiz, but everything else looks strikingly similar to that vitamin water commercial.

In lieu of those two, we have two completely androgynous mixed doubles teams from Indonesia and Korea. One of these teams features, a competitor whose name is pronounced “Wang Yu Mi” which I believe is a line Dunneksi attempted to use at a shady club in Manila while fighting a language barrier and for freedom.

Wang is in fact pronounced like the theatre in Boston, and not like the underachieving pitcher for New York.

Boston 1 NY 0

“Wang has been very good for Korea” hehehehehehehe. (Sorry I just can’t take this sport seriously, but I’m trying.)
The disturbing part of that quote, is that Wang is a she, which is sort of an ironic twist of words from what you might accidentally discover at an Korean massage parlor.

“And Wang can’t deliver!” most drunken Yankee fans feel that pain in more ways than one.

Clearly this announcer, is a little boisterous, and hoping that he might get the call up to a slightly more significant sport if he goes Gus Johnson on us.

While I’m a little disappointed to see badminton go (seriously NBC, if you’re going to give us an all soccer channel, can’t you give us badminton) it’s time for the main event (for me) with the US taking on Venezuela.
I never thought I’d say this, but I miss John Kruk. This announcer clearly has never seen a softball game in his life. At least Bill Clement sounded somewhat informed on trap shooting yesterday.
Meanwhile this guy has never seen the 2nd baseman cover first.

As Jennie Finch grunts and moans through every pitch, a world away teenage boys are doing the same…

For all you college kids out there looking for a reason besides Finch to watch this sport, I urge you to play the “softball will not be part of the 2012 Olympics drinking game” Anytime the announcers over the next 10 days mention in any way this being the last Olympics for softball as a sport, you must take a drink.
Warning, may cause alcohol poisoning or death

Taking a page from TBS playoff baseball coverage, while still awat at commercial we missed a home run from Crystal Bustos, who is still vying for the top spot in People’s least popular annual issue, the 50 most ugly people in America.
Despite her putrid look, she is absolutely must watch tv when she is hitting, think of a more portly Manny Ramirez, and twice as much power.

5-0 after three, and I’m glad NBC has taken the time to inform us of the run rule, so I might be able to get some sleep, or more badminton.

It looks like I found out what my former assistant and current deplorable human being is doing for the summer.....coaching the Venezuela outfield.
I haven’t seen such poor play on popups since, oh about five months ago on a daily basis.

Memo to Michelle Smith, an 11-0 bludgeoning is not the time to try to convince a skeptical and uninformed American audience that the rest of the world is catching up.

And this has officially gotten uglier than Crystal Bustos and Monica Abbot on the cover of the Swimsuit edition, bring back badminton.

Back in the AM with some Angola/US Redeem Team hoops…. Also on the to do list for today is swimming on Telemundo. If they can make soccer sound exciting imagine what they could do with a sprint race. I hope the gooooaaaaaalllll!!!!! Guy is there so he can offer up exclamations of Gooollllddd!